So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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