Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Randomize