do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Randomize
