nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
