I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
