At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
