Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize