dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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