This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
We're using joints as your birthday candles
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
