Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
