That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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