ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
