in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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