the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
