i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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