You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
