Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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