He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
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