i barfeds in our rink
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
