The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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