Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Randomize