so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
