No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
