New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Floor bacon is actually really good
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