She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
