week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
