When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
