What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize