so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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