Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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