I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
