is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
