I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize