Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize