my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
The best revenge is premature balding
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize