your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize