But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize