Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I CAN MOONWALK!
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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