y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I looked at my own cervix.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
