its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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