I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
