there's paper in my vomit.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize