No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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