it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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