they need to just BURY HIM!
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
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