Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I need moral support for this bender
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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