You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Randomize
