I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Randomize
