my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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