OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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