he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Success! We fucked roommates!
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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