someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
