im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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