he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
